Writer Heather Jones shares the story of how her own “year from hell” changed her career for the better...

“I look forward to reading your published books one day.”

When my grade four teacher wrote these words to me, I had no doubt they would come true. I was going to be a writer, and that was that. Yet nearly thirty years later, and I had nothing published. This wasn’t because I had lost my interest in writing, or my talent as a writer – I simply hadn’t tried. What I had lost was my nerve.

Enter 2016. Known to our family as “The Year From Hell”, 2016 tore my life apart piece by piece. Weeks in, my husband unexpectedly became unable to work. As I had only been working part-time so that I could spend more time caring for our children my income was negligible. I vividly recall running out of ketchup and realising we couldn’t afford to replace it. I was genuinely concerned about how we would feed our two small children.

My husband was eligible for a disability allowance, but it was a full year before we began receiving that help. In the meantime, we were granted minimal welfare support. When our case worker told us that we were approved I burst into tears in the middle of the government office. It was very little money, but it meant that we could pay our rent and feed our children. I began to relax a little, thinking we could hold on until my husband’s disability benefits were approved or until I could find a full-time job.

But The Year From Hell was not done with us. A degenerative spine condition I have lived with for most of my life worsened. Months before, I had been walking for hours a day, and suddenly I was unable to stand for more than a minute at a time. My plans to return to work as a day-care teacher became unrealistic. I could not physically handle the job, and I had no experience in any area of work that would be able to accommodate my new disability.

It was autumn when the biggest blow hit – our landlords decided that they were going to stop renting and we had two months to find a new place to live. With neither of us working full-time it quickly became clear that we would not be able to afford a suitable family home. We began plans to move into my parents’ three-bedroom, one-bathroom house. We were incredibly grateful to have my parents willing and able to take us in – but we knew squeezing six of us into such close quarters was going to be challenging.

We left our family home to move in with my parents on New Year’s Eve. 2017 began the next day, and I was determined to start anew. I labelled this year “The Rebuilding Year”. In a new city and unable to walk for more than the length of a hallway I knew that I couldn’t return to my former career. I was going to have to be creative.

A friend who was a freelance writer and editor had offered to introduce me to a parenting publication, knowing that I had always wanted to write. Though writing was my dream career, I never had the courage to leave the safety of regular work and leap into the uncertain world of freelancing. Then came 2017 – The Rebuilding Year – the year in which I had nothing to lose.

I bought a fancy journal. I found a regular seat at Starbucks. I started taking free online classes on writing, and I made a game plan. It started with publishing some online articles for a small parenting website. I then reached out to the editor of a slightly bigger parenting website, and began writing articles for them. In between articles, I researched, I networked, and I did anything I could to learn about the industry. I made friends within the writing community, joined writing groups, learned how to pitch and who to pitch to. By the end of 2017, though I did not have an extensive portfolio or a liveable income, I was writing regularly.

In the years since, I have continued to grow my writing career. In 2018, I had to pay taxes – something I had not had to do since working full-time a number of years ago. It meant I was making a legitimate income. It meant that I was good at this. It meant I could do this. I now write regularly for several publications and have bylines in many different places. When I fill out forms and am prompted for my occupation, I confidently fill in “Writer”.

This year, I was published in a print anthology. My work is in a book. I thought of my grade four teacher, and wondered if she would ever know that I fulfilled her prediction for me. Mrs. Hunter, I made it.

2020 was a collective Year From Hell for the world. For many, 2021 For so many, it became the year that their lives fell apart. Having been through having the floor fall out from under me, I understand how stressful and terrifying it is to look into the future and see blank space. It’s almost impossible not to shut down completely.

Falling apart is necessary. But then what? My advice for everyone facing uncertainty after this terrible year is to follow the advice given to me by a friend when I was facing my own rock bottom: “Gather up your scattered dreams a build a life you love.” This is a mantra. When everything is broken, who says it needs to be reassembled the same way it was before? When you have nothing to lose, why not go for what you have always wanted?

I realise that this advice comes from a place of privilege. I was incredibly lucky to have my parents to give me a soft place to land. Not everyone can simply start over. While doing so was one of the hardest things I have ever done, I am fortunate enough to have had the opportunity to do so at all.

But for those who can, I’m here to say that it’s worth it. It’s scary and it’s uncertain, but it’s worth it. That’s not to say that I don’t still struggle. Even with my writing and my husband’s disability, our income is still comparatively low. We still live with my parents while we continue to work towards getting to a place where we can afford a home of our own, even if it’s a rental. Some days are hard. A lot of days are hard. But the pride I have in having made real my lifelong dream make the hard days worth it.

If this year has knocked you down – or even if you simply aren’t where you want to be – look at what you can do now to build the life you want. It starts small. I started with buying a journal.